Chaos cooking with Claire: forget the recipe and do what you feel.


Me and my pasta.

It would be a gross offense to anyone with any culinary expertise to call myself a chef and yet four times a week, when I find it in myself (and my pantry) to whip up a full meal, my whole apartment complex can probably hear me yelling about being a chef or being ready to face off against Gordon Ramsey or having unmatched talent in the kitchen. 

That means I have to be cooking elaborate and technically complex meals. Right? 

Well, no. 

The truth is I’ve probably just cooked pasta. 

But like, really good pasta. 

Right now, my pantry is looking pretty barren and my fresh food supply is at an all time low. This means that recently my meals have been reduced to rice and beans and whatever frozen vegetables I find in the depths of my freezer. 

But last night I needed good food – a little Monday pick me up amidst very scary and stressful times.  So I scavenged the kitchen for any ingredients that I deemed acceptable to mix together and decided that I could make some homemade pasta sauce to go with angel hair pasta. 

And not to brag, but that shit was absolutely delicious. So delicious in fact, that I am going to share it with you. 

Warning, this is NOT a recipe, this is a cook along. If you don’t vibe with an ingredient or technique, don’t use it! This is all about cooking through feeling, so grab your pots and pans and get settled in, we are going on a culinary adventure. 

What you’ll need: white onion, kale, canned diced tomatoes, garlic, olive oil, salt, pepper, tomato paste, parmigiano-reggiano, angel hair pasta, red pepper flakes, dried oregano 

  1. Heat up a large sauté pan over, like, medium but lower medium heat and once it’s hot put however much olive oil you think would be good to coat the pan and cook things in. That feels like two tablespoons to me but who knows, I didn’t measure mine.
  2. Then you’re going to want to dice the onion. I only used half because I wasn’t trying to feed a village and also because dicing onions is hard and my roommate had to do it for me. 
  3. Throw the onions in the not hot and oiled sauté pan. 
  4. While the onions are sweating, mince some garlic. I used three large cloves but garlic to your desired taste, I don’t make the rules. 
  5. Once the onions are almost translucent throw the garlic in the pan. I did this because the garlic cooks faster. I’ve burnt the shit out of some garlic before and you don’t want to have to start over and chop more onion, that’d truly be a disaster. 
  6. If you’re me, you had the pan too hot and almost burnt your garlic so turn the heat down a little bit. 
  7. Then add some tomato paste. Approximately two tablespoons but just do what feels right. I don’t really know if I should have added the tomato paste before the tomatoes but I think I saw Andrew Rea from Binging with Babish do it once so I figured, “Hey, why not?!”
  8. Stir the tomato paste and onions together and let them cook a little more. Don’t really have a reason for this one
  9. Next dump in a can of diced tomatoes, whatever kind you have around.
  10. Mix that all in together. 
  11. Grab a few handfuls of kale (I filled my strainer to the top and just went with that as a measurement) and rinse them off. 
  12. Throw the kale into the sauté pan,  add a splash or two or water and cover with a lid to create a steamy environment. 
  13. Start heating up a pot of water for the angel hair. I wait to put salt in until it’s about to boil so I don’t make the boil point higher but I could also be lying about that and just not know. 
  14. Once your water is a’boiling, add the angel hair (I used half a box and am managing to get around 5 servings out of it) and cook until your desired al dente-ness. This was about four minutes for me. 
  15. Strain your pasta. If you’re smart, you’ll save a little bit of the pasta water to add to the sauce so the pasta and sauce mix together better because I forgot and only remembered once my pasta water was making a haste exit down my drain. 
  16. At this point your kale/tomato solution has hopefully been steaming for 10-15 minutes and the kale has turned bright green and shriveled down. 
  17. Add a few shakes of dried oregano (if you want)
  18. Add a few shakes of red pepper flakes (if you so desire) 
  19. Now personally I like putting parmesan directly into the sauce so if you too like to do that or if you want to try something new, grate some parmesan into the sauce. Pecorino is also good, you could try that ( I couldn’t, I didn’t have any pecorino) 
  20. Throw the pasta into the sauté pan with the sauce ( and a little of the pasta water if you have that). 
  21. Mix it up
  22. Plate it up
  23. Grate it up (more parmesan that is) 
  24. Eat it up

So there you have it. 

The first and probably only chaos cooking with Claire. 

Well.

 I could vlog it next time?

Jk…jk…

Unless?

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